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 Works Jokes

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Baskar
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PostSubject: Works Jokes   Mon Feb 04, 2008 1:54 pm

Job Application

This is an actual job application that a 17 year old boy submitted to McDonald's in Florida... and they hired him because he was so honest and funny!

NAME: Greg Bulmash.

SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.

DESIRED POSITION: Company's President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.

DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.

EDUCATION: Yes.

LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.

SALARY: Less than I'm worth.

MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.

REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.

HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.

PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.

DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment.

MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?

DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what?

DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be "Do you have a car that runs?"

HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing house Sweepstakes.

DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job no, on my breaks yes.

WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.

DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Yes. Absolutely.

SIGN HERE: Aries.
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Baskar
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PostSubject: Re: Works Jokes   Mon Feb 04, 2008 2:03 pm

My Job Experience

My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned, ...couldn't concentrate.

Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the ax.

After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it ... mainly because it was a so-so job.

Next I tried working in a muffler factory but that was too exhausting.

Then I tried to be a chef -- figured it would add a little spice to my life, but I just didn't have the time.

I attempted to be a deli worker, but any way I sliced it, I couldn't cut the mustard.

My best job was being a musician, but eventually I found I wasn't noteworthy.

I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn't have any patience.

Next was a job in a shoe factory; I tried but I just didn't fit in.

I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my net income.

I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but the work was just too draining.

So then I got a job in a workout center, but they said I wasn't fit for the job.

After many years of trying to find steady work I finally got a job as a historian until I realized there was no future in it.

My last job was working at Starbucks, but I had to quit because it was always the same old grind
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Thee$ha
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PostSubject: Re: Works Jokes   Tue Feb 05, 2008 12:44 am

enna kodumai ithu? lol! Good Job

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Baskar
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PostSubject: Re: Works Jokes   Tue Feb 05, 2008 5:08 pm

Theesha ithu kodumai illa this juz joke lol!
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Thee$ha
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PostSubject: Re: Works Jokes   Tue Feb 05, 2008 11:17 pm

is it Baskar? thx for letting me knw Razz

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Baskar
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Nick name: FBEB

PostSubject: Re: Works Jokes   Wed Feb 06, 2008 8:08 pm

ippo than unnaku purinchu irukutha appo ni urup padathu mathiri than theesha Razz
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!!~Panithuli~!!
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PostSubject: Re: Works Jokes   Wed Feb 06, 2008 10:39 pm

bro..ippadi naaanum apply panninaa job tharuvaangalaa???

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Baskar
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Number of posts : 1306
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PostSubject: Re: Works Jokes   Thu Feb 07, 2008 12:09 am

sure bro lol!
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Thee$ha
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Number of posts : 1203
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PostSubject: Re: Works Jokes   Thu Feb 07, 2008 1:14 am

@Baskar: nan urupata enna uru padati unaku enna?

@Panithuli: antha boyku kidaicha mathiri unkaluku may b kidaikalam!! try and tell us wt happend...

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When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us!!!
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Baskar
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Number of posts : 1306
Age : 30
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Job/Studies : STUDENT
Language : Tamil & English
Registration date : 2007-12-09

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Gold: 10 BILLION
Nick name: FBEB

PostSubject: Re: Works Jokes   Thu Feb 07, 2008 1:18 am

Becuz ni ennoda best friend n i care abt my friend Razz
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Thee$ha
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Number of posts : 1203
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Language : Tamil & English
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Gold: 90
Nick name: AP

PostSubject: Re: Works Jokes   Thu Feb 07, 2008 1:19 am

ah Baskar enai ondum pesa elama seithutiye....I'm proud of u my best friend Very Happy

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When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us!!!
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Baskar
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Number of posts : 1306
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Job/Studies : STUDENT
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Nick name: FBEB

PostSubject: Re: Works Jokes   Thu Feb 07, 2008 1:21 am

thanks Theesha
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!!~Panithuli~!!
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PostSubject: Re: Works Jokes   Thu Feb 07, 2008 1:28 am

tim hortinila apply panni paarkanum........normala applly panninaa avanga reply pannuramaathi theryalai soo

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Thee$ha
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PostSubject: Re: Works Jokes   Thu Feb 07, 2008 1:31 am

lol! Panithuli, avanga normal ku reply panurathu iliya? y? ninga athuku kuda qualify iliya? lol!

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!!~Panithuli~!!
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PostSubject: Re: Works Jokes   Thu Feb 07, 2008 1:33 am

adipaavi.......no no i used to work in tim.....for few weeks then....quite panneetanaa so

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Baskar
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Number of posts : 1306
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PostSubject: The Pay Raise!   Sun Feb 24, 2008 4:02 pm

The Pay Raise!

One morning, a company CEO read an unusual letter from one of his employees:

Dear Bo$$,

A$ all of u$ have read in the new$paper$, the U$ economy ha$ come out of the rece$$ion.

In thi$ life, we all need $ome thing mo$t de$perately. I think you $hould be under$tanding of the need$ of u$ worker$ who have given $o much $upport including $weat and $ervice to your company.

I am $ure you will gue$$ what I mean and re$pond $oon.

Your$ $incerely,



-----------------------------------------

The next day, the employee received this reply:

Dear,

I kNOw you have been working very hard. NOwadays, NOthing much has changed. You must have NOticed that our company is NOt doing NOticeably well as of yet.

NOw the newspapers are saying the world's leading ecoNOmists are NOt sure if the United States may go into aNOther recession. After the NOvember presidential elections things may turn bad.

I have NOthing more to add NOw. You kNOw what I mean.

Yours truly,

Manager
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Thee$ha
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PostSubject: Re: Works Jokes   Sun Feb 24, 2008 6:56 pm

hehe so in the first one thy r askng for money n the next one he means no...very cool..the way thy said tht..

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PostSubject: Re: Works Jokes   Sun Feb 24, 2008 7:20 pm

jokes ellaam ippadi pirichi padikkakooda....padichavudanai purinchirukkanum Cool lol3



Good Job BRO

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